【#少兒英語# #五分鐘兒童英語笑話故事#】給孩子營(yíng)造一個(gè)英語的氛圍很關(guān)鍵，從磨耳朵開始，試著給孩子聽聽英文繪本故事，充分利用很多英文原聲的有聲讀物，幫助孩子熟悉英語。©無憂考網(wǎng)搜集的《五分鐘兒童英語笑話故事》，希望對(duì)同學(xué)們有幫助。
1.五分鐘兒童英語笑話故事
visual training
視力訓(xùn)練
the squad(班，小隊(duì)) were having "visual training". one smart recruit(新兵，招募) was asked by the officer to count how many men composed a digging party in a distant field. the party was so faraway(遙遠(yuǎn)的，恍惚的.) that the men appeared as mere dots, but unhesitatingly(迅速地) the recruit replied：
班里正在進(jìn)行“視力訓(xùn)練”。一個(gè)聰明伶俐的新兵被班長(zhǎng)叫出來數(shù)遠(yuǎn)處曠野上采掘隊(duì)的人數(shù)。采掘隊(duì)在很遠(yuǎn)的地方，那些人看起來只是一些小點(diǎn)兒。但是這個(gè)新兵毫不猶豫地回答。
"sixteen men and a sergeant(中士，軍士) , sir."
“十六個(gè)兵外加一個(gè)中士，長(zhǎng)官�！�
"right, but how do you know there's a sergeant there?"
“正確，可是你怎么知道那兒有一個(gè)中士?”
"he's not doing any digging, sir."
“他不干活，長(zhǎng)官。”
2.五分鐘兒童英語笑話故事
這鐘準(zhǔn)嗎?
Dan was the doorman of a club in a big city.
丹在一個(gè)大城市的某個(gè)俱樂部當(dāng)守門人。
Everyday, thousands of people passed his door,
每天都有數(shù)千人經(jīng)過他的門口，
and a lot of them stopped and asked him, "What's the time, please?"
而且許多人都會(huì)停下來問他:“請(qǐng)問現(xiàn)在幾點(diǎn)?”
After a few months, Dan said to himself, "I'm not going to answer all those stupid people any more.
幾個(gè)月后，丹想:“我不想再回答這些蠢人提出的問題了，
I'm going to buy a big clock
我要去買一只大鐘，
and put it upon the wall here."
把它掛在這兒的墻上。
Then he did so.
于是他買了一只鐘，把它掛在了墻上。
“Now people aren't going to stop and ask me the time," he thought happily.“
現(xiàn)在人們總不會(huì)再停下來問我時(shí)間了。”他高興地想。
But after that, a lot of people stopped,
可是打那以后，每天仍有許多人停下來，
looked at the clock and then asked Dan, "Is that clock right?”
看看鐘，然后問丹:“這鐘準(zhǔn)嗎?”
3.五分鐘兒童英語笑話故事
收考卷
One day a student was taking a very difficult essay exam. At the end of the test, the professor asked all the students to put their pencils down and immediately hand in their tests. The young man kept writing furiously，although he was warned that if he did not stop immediately he would be disqualified. He ignored the warning, finished the test 10 minutes later, and went to hand the test to his instructor. The instructor told him he would not take the test.
一天，一個(gè)學(xué)生正在參加一個(gè)非常難的論文考試。考試結(jié)束了，教授讓所有的學(xué)生放下鉛筆，把他們的試卷交上來。但是他仍舊在不停地寫。無論教授怎么警告他，甚至說如果不馬上停筆的話就取消他的考試資格。這個(gè)學(xué)生仍舊在不停地答卷。十分鐘后他寫完了，但是教授拒絕收他的試卷。
The student asked, "Do you know who l am?"
這個(gè)學(xué)生問:“你知道我是誰嗎?”
The professor said，"No and I don’t care.
教授嚴(yán)肅地回答說:“不，我也不想知道你是誰。”學(xué)生繼續(xù)追問說:“你真的不知道我是誰?”
The student asked again，"Are you sure you don't know who I am?"
教授說不知道。
The professor again said no. So the student walked over to the pile of tests, placed his in the middle，then threw the papers in the air.
然后，這個(gè)學(xué)生走到那堆試卷前，把他的試卷塞到了那堆試卷的中間，然后把它們?nèi)珤佅蛄丝罩小?
"Good.” the student said, and walked out. He passed
“太好了�！睂W(xué)生說完就離開了。他考試通過了。
4.五分鐘兒童英語笑話故事
干凈的杯子
joe and fred were helping to build a house in a village. the weather was very warm, there was a lot of dust everywhere, and by half past twelve, they were very thirsty, so they stopped work to have their lunch. they found the nearest small bar, went in and sat down with their sandwiches.
喬和佛瑞德在一個(gè)村子里幫忙蓋一間房子。天氣很暖和，到處都有許多灰塵。12點(diǎn)半的時(shí)候，他們覺得非�？诳�，便停下來去吃午飯了。他們找到最近的一家酒吧，走進(jìn)去坐下吃他們的三明治。
good afternoon, gentlemen. what can i get you? the man behind the bar asked.
下午好，先生。你們想要點(diǎn)什么?柜臺(tái)后面的伺應(yīng)問道。
joe looked at fred and said, beer, i think. yes, a pint of beer each. is that all right for you, fred?
喬看了看佛瑞德說：我想，啤酒吧。好，那就每人一品脫啤酒。這樣可以嗎，佛瑞德?
yes, that's all right. fred said. then he turned to the man behind the bar and said, and i want it in a clean glass! don't forget that.
好的，可以。佛瑞德說。然后他轉(zhuǎn)過去跟柜臺(tái)后面的侍應(yīng)說：我要啤酒裝在一個(gè)干凈的杯子里!別忘了。
the man behind the bar filled the glasses and brought them to joe and fred. then he said. which of you asked for the clean glass?
柜臺(tái)后面的侍應(yīng)倒?jié)M杯子后，拿給喬和佛瑞德，接著說：剛才哪一位要干凈的杯子的?
5.五分鐘兒童英語笑話故事
會(huì)說話的青蛙
A man was crossing a road one day when a frog called out to him and said: "If you kiss me, I’1l turn into a beautiful princess.” He bent over, picked up the frog and put it in his pocket. The frog spoke up again and said: "If you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful princess，I will tell everyone how smart and brave you are and how you are my hero” The man took the frog out of his pocket，smiled at it，and returned it to his pocket.
一天，一個(gè)男人走在路上。這時(shí)一只青蛙喊住他說:“如果你吻我，那我就會(huì)變成一個(gè)漂亮的公主�！彼琢讼聛�，撿起了青蛙并把他放到了口袋里。青蛙大聲地說:“如果你吻我，那我就會(huì)變成一個(gè)漂亮的公主。我會(huì)告訴每一個(gè)人，你是多么的聰明，多么得勇敢以及你是怎么成為我的英雄的�！蹦腥税亚嗤軓目诖锾土顺鰜恚瑢�(duì)它笑了笑，又把它放了回去。
The frog spoke up again and said，"1f you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful princess，I will be your loving companion for an entire week” The man took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it，and returned it to his pocket. The frog then cried out, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a princess，I'11 stay with you for a year and do ANYTHING you want.”Again，the man took the frog out，smiled at it, and put it back into his pocket.
青蛙又大聲地說:“如果你吻我，那我就會(huì)變成一個(gè)漂亮的公主，而且我會(huì)成為你最愛的同伴，并陪你度過整個(gè)一周。”男人把青蛙從口袋里掏了出來，對(duì)它笑了笑，又把它放了回去。青蛙再次大聲喊道:“如果你吻我，那我就會(huì)變成一個(gè)漂亮的公主，而且我會(huì)陪伴你一年，做任何你希望的事情�！蹦腥税亚嗤軓目诖锾土顺鰜�，對(duì)它笑了笑，又把它放了回去。
Finally, the frog asked，"What is the matter? I’ve told you I’m a beautiful princess, that I’1l stay with you for a year and do anything you want. Why won’t you kiss me?" The man said，"Look，I’m an engineer. I don't have time for a girlfriend, but a talking frog is cool.”
最后，青蛙問:“怎么了?我已經(jīng)告訴你，我是一個(gè)漂亮的公主，并且我會(huì)陪伴你一年，做任何你希望的事情，你為什么不吻我呢?”男人說:“我是一個(gè)工程師，我沒有時(shí)間陪女朋友，但是，陪一只會(huì)說話的青蛙就太棒了�！�
